Popular culture no longer applies to me

Last year, everyone was raving (literally) about the new fashion: Nu-rave. I think that Tom Clarke summed it up perfectly:

What is new rave? New rave, you say it, it sounds like shit. Old rave was proper. Well, it’s not even old rave, but rave was proper. New rave is just a bunch of shit bands playing shit songs really, really quick, that’s what new rave is. There’s no point in it. There’s no musicianship, no songs, no point. It’s a bandwagon and people will ride along it for a couple of minutes then it’ll finish hopefully.

And it did finish. Very quickly.
Well boys and girls it’s been a whole year and where has this preserve of Neverland’s Lost Boys taken us? Nowhere. Fuckwhere. What I want to know is what the new cool thing is this summer. Not for me, I’m fine being my own rolling stone, but I am sick to death of looking at Pete Docherty clones everywhere. Hitting them over the head with a giant glow stick feels fantastic. I want a change of scenery. Well according to the street it’s still 1969 and everyone is in the Libertines. But come on guys, it’s been years now. Where’s the new break?

It just makes me think, “What is up with this place? Burma has gone to shit and Mark Speight from SMart isn’t answering his phone (anyone seen him?)”.
It’s not good enough teenagers. Get your act together.
That’s why this summer I am donning suits, like a right Portobello bastard. Dave Davies was found in bed with 5 girls at the age of 16. That my friends, is what suits do for you. A few years ago I would have been stabbed at for wearing a suit, but I’m approaching the “wear what the fuck you want” age of life (16-34).

I’m taking a leaf out of the book of Eddie Argos (”Wet trousers in the washing machine, but I’d rather be damp than seen in jeans”). Eddie may be in the same category as “That girls an Indie Cindy, Lego haircut and polka-dot dress” but you have to respect this guy. If the scene wasn’t so cheesy he would be a real legend: Fucking Hoosiers weighing Eddo down.

This guy is Jarvis Cocker and I have a Pulp Addiction. It may all be “Wear-Straw-Hats-And-Wayfarers” but some people know what to do: throw away the jeans and get your threads in M&S.
Only could old Eddie make the title of this post a pop-culture reference in itself.